The Glamorous Life of a Consultant

Sure, it seems cool enough. Visits to distant and exotic sounding locations (exotic, at least to my midwestern friends). Working with big names in the high-tech and aerospace industries. But there is a dichotomy to the entire scenario. To an outsider, it looks wonderful...exciting...enticing.

My friend JP Hansen builds and maintains saltwater reef tanks as a hobby. They are marvelous to look at. When you look into them, the coral seems captivating, everything is in its place, and so perfect. But what would it be like to be one of the fish?

Today, because of shifting schedules, shifting priorities, last-minute changes, and airline ticket restrictions; I'm sitting in a $55 hotel room in San Jose on a Sunday afternoon writing code for one of my customers. I'm in the midst of the biscotti and latte crowd and I'm munching 'Nilla wafers and drinking Folgers...

You see, I'm one of those fish. It all looked so pretty from outside the tank...frequent flyer miles and upgrade perks, nice hotels, new cities. Then, I got in and got to stand in line (alot), wait (at airports, rental car centers, train stations, etc), listen to leaky toilets, smell the various and rarely pleasant fragrances of air travel, get food poisoning (I think three times now), and hardly EVER get to do anything fun in any of those cities I've visited because I'm booked so tightly.

The funny thing is, people still look "in" at me and think it looks so nice. My wife even sometimes hints that she thinks its more fun than I make it out to be. I guess maybe there are some people who enjoy the rigors of working on the road. In-flight publications try to make it sound glamorous by calling us "Road Warriors". I'm no road warrior, I shaved off my mohawk in 1987 :-)